Film Review - Kill List

Every now and then, a film comes out that gets rave reviews from critics, and turns out to be absolute garbage. We've already had the abysmal Hanna this year, but this makes that look like a coherent masterpiece.
At times, shockingly brutal and uncomfortable to watch, but mostly this film is a tedious case of "yawn, this had better be leading somewhere good". And it most certainly does not. The poor Wicker Man-esque ending is so misjudged it just undermines everything that's gone before (and I love The Wicker Man).
There's a pretty horrific final reveal, and I don't have a problem with that per se, it's the way it was so poorly executed. The supposed planted clues don't actually make sense even when you know the ending. As Eddie Izzard once said, it's easy to write an unexpected twist- e.g. a man comes home and a pig eats him. This is one of those.
Truly dreadful.

Film Review - Apollo 18

A partially successful Blair Witch on the moon, but ultimately too tedious to be scary. A nice idea though.

Film Review - La Piel Que Habito (The Skin I Live In)

Pedro Admoldóvar is one twisted dude. And, quite frankly, I've found his work to date pretty unremarkable, despite various awards, nominations and plaudits. However, this time I feel he's deserved them. The direction is stunning, the visual effects are beautifully subtle, and comparisons with Hitchcock are warranted, as I found myself reminded of Vertigo and Dial M For Murder at times. I was compelled from beginning to end, and surprisingly disappointed when it ended, as I could have kept watching.

Film Review - The Guard

A lot of love out there for this one, but I found it all a bit... meh. It certainly has its moments; the cast have great chemistry, and there's more than its fair share of one-liners, but I couldn't help but keep looking at my watch. Give me In Bruges or Intermission any day.

Film review - Final Destination 5

After a few lacklustre sequels, the Final Destination franchise finally moves back on track, giving us the spectacular and creative deaths we're after. A few new twists are thrown in, and the balance of gore vs laughter is about right, although it still doesn't quite match the first two. Unfortunately, a lot of time is wasted on characterisation- that's not a complaint you hear often, but we don't watch these films to see relationships develop, we want to see Death get his way. Everything else just holds up proceedings.

Film Review: Cowboys & Aliens

Disappointingly tedious. Overlong passages where nothing happens, and no obvious storylines or mysteries to keep you in suspense while you're waiting (and waiting) for something to happen. Unfortunately there's barely a chuckle either as it takes its preposterous premise rather seriously.
It's mostly a western, but even the scifi elements are over-familiar. The Cloverfield alien blueprint is back (yawn), and their spaceships just look like spare ribs.
It's not a complete disaster. Daniel Craig is especially good and there's a twist you might not see coming (not a particularly good one though). It's not quite Twilight boring, but gets there at times. Not what you'd expect from the director of Iron Man.

Film Review: Rise of the Planet of the Apes

As someone with only a passing knowledge of the original movie(s)- mostly thanks to that Simpsons episode- this came as a complete surprise. It speeds along almost as though it's showing you highlights, and yet you don't feel like you're missing anything.

Andy Serkis achieves CGI gold yet again as protagonist chimp Caesar, acting everybody off the screen. The camerawork, visual effects, and shots of San Francisco are breathtaking.

The only let-down is the human cast. Their characters never achieve even one dimension; James Franco is back to Oscar-host dreadful, Frieda Pinto just gets to look beautiful (though succeeds supremely), Tom "Draco Malfoy" Felton is quite successfully typecast as a sneering bully, but his American accent is painful.

You might think you have seen everything in the trailer, but they've kept the biggest revelation a secret. The cinema audience's reaction alone was worth the ticket price.