Film Review - Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy

It's not you, it's me. You lost me at "hello".

This might as well have been set to a foreign language audio track, without subtitles, and set to "shuffle" for all the sense it made to me. Familiar face after familiar face are presented (rather than introduced) on-screen as their names, roles, relationships, etc. appear far too trivial for such a complex piece. Unfortunately, such information is absolutely essential for me to follow such a film, so the second they mention someone and you ask yourself "which one's that?", you're pretty much tapped on the shoulder and asked to leave the dancefloor, as from thereon in you don't stand a chance.

I literally (and I literally mean LITERALLY) cannot remember ever caring less about anyone or anything on-screen. I may as well have been watching football. I can't say I hated it, as not one character was interesting enough to hate, let alone root for. There was a moment I would have happily given Tom Hardy a big "there there" hug, but it likely had little to do with the film. The only time I perked up over the tedious two hours was when I realised Benedict Cumberbatch reminded me of the alien from Close Encounters.

The film looks gorgeous- the direction is beautiful and patient. Unfortunately I'm not. Not without some kind of pay-off, anyway. Director Alfredson's previous film, the sublime Let The Right One In, had a similar directorial approach. However, that film had an emotional core, an involving narrative, intriguing characters and multiple pay-off moments that rewarded your patience. This has none of the above.

I'm not trying to persuade anybody this is a bad film. I'm sure it isn't and would happily put money on it now to win Best Picture at next year's Oscars (and I'll bet my life on the BAFTAs). If it worked for you, good for you, you must be cleverer than I am. For me, I'd have to say the emperor had no clothes on.

If only...

(c) SRW 2011. All opinions are mine. If you like what you read, all the better; if not, other opinions are available.

Film Review - Fright Night (2011)

A surprisingly decent vampire movie, something that is extremely rare. It gets the tone just right, with the exception of David Tennant's character, whose comedic character appears to have wandered in from a different film. I haven't seen the original (yet) so can't compare, but whilst this was decent, I can't see me watching it again.

Film Review - The Troll Hunter

For a presumably low-budget Norwegian film, this plays surprisingly like a mainstream Hollywood movie. Pacy, well-made and nicely tense at times, the visual effects are pretty decent too. The found-footage gimmick may be getting a bit tired now, but at least this is one of those occasions, like [.REC] and Blair Witch that uses it correctly.

Film Review - Friends With Benefits

A romantic comedy without the romance or the comedy, this was an easy watch but didn't have me laughing out loud. If anything, at times it made me feel a bit melancholic. The two leads are likeable enough, and there are a few neat ideas in there, most of it seen before or, at best, highly predictable.

Film Review - Kill List

Every now and then, a film comes out that gets rave reviews from critics, and turns out to be absolute garbage. We've already had the abysmal Hanna this year, but this makes that look like a coherent masterpiece.
At times, shockingly brutal and uncomfortable to watch, but mostly this film is a tedious case of "yawn, this had better be leading somewhere good". And it most certainly does not. The poor Wicker Man-esque ending is so misjudged it just undermines everything that's gone before (and I love The Wicker Man).
There's a pretty horrific final reveal, and I don't have a problem with that per se, it's the way it was so poorly executed. The supposed planted clues don't actually make sense even when you know the ending. As Eddie Izzard once said, it's easy to write an unexpected twist- e.g. a man comes home and a pig eats him. This is one of those.
Truly dreadful.

Film Review - Apollo 18

A partially successful Blair Witch on the moon, but ultimately too tedious to be scary. A nice idea though.

Film Review - La Piel Que Habito (The Skin I Live In)

Pedro Admoldóvar is one twisted dude. And, quite frankly, I've found his work to date pretty unremarkable, despite various awards, nominations and plaudits. However, this time I feel he's deserved them. The direction is stunning, the visual effects are beautifully subtle, and comparisons with Hitchcock are warranted, as I found myself reminded of Vertigo and Dial M For Murder at times. I was compelled from beginning to end, and surprisingly disappointed when it ended, as I could have kept watching.